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Dr. Clive's Blog

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Free Talk 9th October - how change really happens?

All my life I've been preoccupied with how people change.

The biggest problem in achieving change seems to be that:

We want everyone and everything else to change but not us.

We are not the problem. Other people are! And so with this in mind we do all we can to get them to change. We might spend years, even decades trying to get them to change. In the end we resign ourselves to the fact that they are never going to change and so the problem will never be fixed and we just better shut up and get on with it.

Turns out change is possible if we just focus on changing us. But then we get stuck again because it's so unfair! We are not the problem!

Turns out if we focus on changing us, we might just be the solution.

Joseph Campbell, the creator of the Hero's Journey and the idea of Following your Bliss, spent a life time examining the process of how people change in stories. Did you realise that the Snow White we read about at the beginning of the story is not the same Snow White by the end? She had to change to get rid of that nasty horrible step-mother the Queen! Likewise Harry Potter. When we first meet Harry he lives in a cupboard under the stairs and is harassed by nasty relatives (sound familiar?). By the end of the story however he is a different person, having identified and defeated the person who killed his parents and was trying to kill him.

Heroes are people who learn to change in order to address a problem they face. Some of the time they don't want to change. Some of the time changing feels very scary and unknown. But in the end, if they want to solve their problem, then they have to change.

The funny thing is that by the end of the story, heroes have solved the problem and been changed. What's even funnier is that they usually like their new changed selves! Their lives are better for it and so too are their relationships.

So what are you going to do? Spend the rest of your life trying to change people and failing, or is it possible that you just might change and make all the difference?

This talk is about how you undergo the process of change. See you there.

Venue: Northside Meeting and the Letter Lounge Cafe 100 Windsor Road, Windsor.

Register your interest at

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